Hate

Hmm it's like everythings are moving too fast and I'm stay still. Maybe it's because i'm a little bit moody this week, but i feel rather alone than before. Can you imagine? Me? The neverbeunhappysmilealoteverydayandeverysecondthatlaughmuch girl! That kinda girl, can be hmmm what we call it. Sentimental? And I finally realize that I'm a girl, actually a teenager that have a feeling too.

I don't know whether it's just a came and go feeling or it's really is from my deep deep deeeep heart. I'm not that kinda girl who can easily talk much about my problem, but I simply forget it. It's not easy sometimes, but I do it almost all the time so it be a habit for me. But know.................................. I just want to be somebody else. Somebody else, who can easily tell everyone about how they feel and they can show it easily too.

Du-uh, I hate to be me. But if I think twice, I will say: am I? I don't knoooow! But everything seems to hate me. My friends, my family, even my teacher. I simply think that I'm changing. To be a monster maybe? If everyone suddenly hates me, than what the h*ll are me?

Puh-leaseeeeee, where is my over confidence go? Uuuuh, I never felt this way before. Is it because my trulymadlyunacceptablelove who is so far and too far. But, nu-uh! I think I don't understand my feeling either. Is he really the one I've been thinking of lately?

Hmm you know, it's really weird finding you don't know, you don't understand you feeling. It's like you simply lost your power to control your mind. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH GOD! Help me please, I just want to sleep over night and get my dreams on so I (hope) can forget all of this messy and annoying things. Ah f*ck, I just dont want to be me for a second.

It's time to sleep so byee! (isn't it weird? I suddenly cut of this post. err)